How To

How NOT to Get Into/Out of a Hammock

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If you’re making the switch from a tent to a hammock, the transition can be awkward at best. It took me several weeks before I got the hang of getting in and out of my hammock. Nestling comfortably in my sleeping bag as I gazed down six feet, realizing I left my headlamp, book, or fleece on the ground. #FTW! However, once you get the hang of it (pun intended) you’ll never want to sleep on the ground again. Getting in and out of a hammock can be tricky and intimidating but if you follow a few of these rules, your hammock experience will be off to a good start.

With a hot cup of tea
There’s nothing more relaxing than laying back with a cup of tea. However, I don’t recommend trying to get into your hammock while holding a cup of tea, coffee, or anything hot. There’s nothing relaxing about a second degree burn to the chest or arms.

Jumping In
If you’re tall enough to jump into a hammock it’s probably best you don’t, unless you have the reflexes of a cat. One thing that hammocks have that beds do not is the power of swing. So even if you made it into the hammock, the chances of staying in it are pretty minimal.

When you’ve tied it to, in essence, a twig
Speaking from experience, it is always smart to test the hammock before entering it. Check and make sure the tree you tied it to is not dead, newly planted, or small and brittle. Nothing is more jolting than resting your head right as your hammock is falling to earth.

Hammock 2, Small

Two at a time
So you bought that two-person hammock with someone special in mind and now it’s time to cash in on your investment. If you are trying to snuggle up with your honey, get in the hammock one at a time. Much like a boat, it’s a lot easier to get in when someone else is holding it steady. If you’re in a hurry, tie your hammock low to the ground in advance and let the fun begin.

While drunk
Sharing a drink with your buddies in the woods can be a magical time. Getting into a hammock while hammered is less than magical. Navigating from feet on the ground to whole body in the air can be tricky even while sober, so before you enter your hammock drunk, maybe ask your friends to spot you. It could help you save face, literally.

Without realizing you’re in mid-air
It’s the middle of the night and you wake up with the urge to pee. While in a tent you can just unzip your sleeping bag and roll off your air mattress. If you attempted that on your hammock, you’ll probably land face down. So allow yourself some time to get used to the idea of sleeping in mid-air and be wary the first few nights you use it if you’re making some midnight trips to the bathroom.

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